this guy i met a few weeks ago, has kept asking to meet up for dates. i made excuses, and then agreed. he cooked romantic dinner, dimmed lights, candles, romantic music, wrote out a personalised message in icing on my dessert, played guitar music for me. he gave massages and we sat in front of the fir under a duvet… we kissed. which was really nice. i was confused whether i liked him or not, but i went back for more kisses. each date he tried even harder and we got more passionate. we havent had sex, but we almost had it. i’m 18 and he’s 21. i’m a virgin and don’t want to lose it to just anyone. however, i am very hormonal and it’s hard to resist at times. he’s always hinted at sex, but i stopped him and he’s quite respectful and always listens when i say stop.
anyways i love meeting up with him, cause he’s funny and sweet, but i’m confused if i like him or not.
today we were texting for hours and he kept saying how he thinks i’m beautiful, and how he’s glad he met me, and all these other cheesy lines. he was being very charming, then he asked if i wanted to make it official.
tbh i don’t have a clue what to do. i just enjoy meeting up with him and kissing. what exactly does ‘official’ involve. is it just like a pass for him to have sex with me? is it a part of his game? or do you think he really likes me and wants to get serious? i’ve never been steady before or had sex but he doesn’t know this…. i said "we should see how it goes.." and he said "okay, sorry if i scared you." then i texted back changing the subject and he hasn’t texted… now i think it’s going to be wawkward .. help! what should i do?

5 Comments so far »

  1.  

    Vera Gabriele - said

    December 5 2010 @ 08:27

    I suppose by asking you to make it official he meant ”going steady” being boyfriend and girlfriend..

    I do not believe that he is the kind of guy who would just want to get you into his bed. He listend to you before when you told him you aren’t ready for it. You have to decide whether or not you like this guy. Not every love story starts with a big firework. Sometimes one starts off as good friends and it develops from there into something stronger with time.. If you have the feeling you like him a lot and you want to spend more time with him and get to know him better than you should tell him exactly that.. that you like his company and you want this friendship to grow naturally and you will both see where it takes both of you. If this continues in a positive way when both of you feel the time is right you can take it to a higher level.. I don’t think he is out just for sex. A guy can ask but if you say ”I am still a virgin a want to be sure this is right for me” you should not be ashamed to tell him you are a virgin… but he will understand better why this is a big deal to you to wait until you are ready if he knows you are still a virgin… because I felt the same… I was not waiting for religious reasons I just wanted it to be the right guy and wanted to be not just physically be ready for it but also emotionally.. if he cares about you and you like him you should talk this over with him.. in a relationship it’s very important that one can communicate well with each other. Share ones hopes, dreams, fears, disappointments and joys…

  2.  

    gigglebuster - said

    December 5 2010 @ 08:27

    he wants to pound you until theres no more pounding to do

    you’ll just be a used up fountain to him and then he’ll leave

    make him wait even longer, in fact until you get marride

  3.  

    Sally - said

    December 5 2010 @ 08:27

    i think by "official" he means you guys will officially be boyfriend and girlfriend. it does not mean you will have sex or anything. or that he has any special rights over you.

  4.  

    Ohio Ain't The Whole World - said

    December 5 2010 @ 08:27

    By the looks of it, you’re not ready to be in a relationship or else you wouldn’t be asking us on here. You’ll just know when you’re ready and who you want to be ready for. Don’t fight your true feelings. If you deep down inside would like to be in a relationship with him then go for it! Taking chances is apart of life but don’t do something you’ll regret like give it up to him right as you guys agree in terms of being in a relationship.

  5.  

    Heavy - said

    December 5 2010 @ 08:27

    judging by wat u said bout him, he seems like a nice guy. I think he what he means by "official" is sex. If you like him but arent ready for sex, tell him u wana wait til marriage. If he is ok with that and still treats u nicely and romanticlly, then he might wana get serious and get to know YOU rather than just have sex. If I were u I wud tell him that, if u dont explain y u dont wana get "serious" with him, he will get the impression u dont like him.

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